Friday, November 11, 2005

Death & Life

The daily rigors of the high life trying to market a blog and podcast, not to mention the effort of writing a novel in just thirty days, came to a brief pause due to the passing of my maternal grandmother at the very ripe age of 93.
The thought of her passing and the (nice) service that followed reminded me of a post I wrote last February, when New England Patriots Quarterback Tom Brady was preparing for the Super Bowl when, as the mighty ESPN put it, suffered a personal tragedy when his grandmother died at the age of 94!
Now before I go on, I want to remind everyone that our grandmothers lived to the of age of 93 and 94!
There is no way I can think of to say that these are tragedies. Living into your nineties is an accomplishment, and should be applauded. So that leads to the question of the day. Just how to do you approach the subject of one's passing? Would you really go up to someone who just lost a relative who lived into their nineties and say "Hey, sorry about your grandma man, what a tragedy."
I'm not trying to tell people how to feel, and leaning on the side of caution in these matters is probably very wise, but you don't need to go over board, and classifying all deaths as tragedies, especially when we all are going to die(sorry to remind of everyone of that) and depending on what you believe(or have faith in) we all are going to a better place(or different place), so how is that a tragedy?
A simple "I'm sorry about your grandma" has been very nice, because for someone like me and how I feel can reply, "Thank you, Wow 93, what an accomplishment!"
But it also allows someone else in the family if they feel differently to go, "I know how sad, boo-hoo, boo-hoo.", it doesn't automatically label the situation, and allows the person dealing with situation to show how they feel, without assuming how they feel, and that's what I felt ESPN did with Tom Brady. His 94 year old grandmother dies, while he is preparing for the Super Bowl, this must be a tragedy for him! Like there was no other way he could feel.
In my family we have lost a life, and that is a bummer. But that one life has helped to bring life to many others, in fact if she could have held on for a few more months she would have been a great-great grandmother. Now there is an accomplishment indeed.
All I have left to say is:
Thank you Nanny, it was a pleasure to know you!

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