Thursday, October 06, 2005

Just a Thought!

Last month I wrote (and talked about on The Radioaffliction Podcast) about one of the reasons why I don't think I'm ever getting married. The main reason is it seems that a lot of people get married just for the sake of being married, and while one person may love the other(and vice versa) there is very often something "more" that a person has inside them that they actually seek in another. So why get married? Plenty of reasons, there is peer pressure, you reach a certain age and think "it's now or never", and there are people who think that this is just the way it is, you go to school, get a job, get married, have kids, wait for them to grow up and get the hell out of the house, and then enjoy life! Then there are those who hang moral issues on others and say you need to get married so you can have your hall pass for "knooky", and a reason I didn't think of until last night when I went to see the movie "Wedding Crashers". The movie is very enjoyable but suffers from an all too familiar formula in romantic movies and it almost killed this movie until a late cameo appears and completely saves the film. The formula goes as follows, boy has set behaviors and does what he does and has reasons to justify such behaviors. Boy meets girl and all of a sudden everything comes to a screeching halt, and realizes that birds can sing, and there are such things as stop lights. Boy gets girl to notice him even fall for him, but wait there is some big secret he's kept from her, she finds out and boy loses girl. Boy and girl can't forget about each other, but girl is going to marry another guy anyway(usually a complete putz, and someone you wouldn't invite into your own home, the only exception being Bill Pullman in "Sleepless in Seattle", but he was so sappy it almost doesn't count), so boy has to do something very spectacular in order to get girl back, and they run off into the sunset to what we believe is happily ever after.
There you see is my problem. The romantic movie formula (to me) has some how affected the marriage "theory" of today. These movies only show how people fall in love and never show what it's like to be in love once two people have recognized their souls counterpoint in someone(Owen Wilson's definition of true love in the movie), apparently they think the process just repeats itself over and over again.
So once again I'm left to ponder, but at least I can recognize and define such issues, and will continue to wait for the "more" or my soul's counterpoint.
Until next time,


bizdriven said...

As a married man, I say that you don't know what you are missing, and instead of philosophising about it, the only way to know is to do it (grin)...

wilson ng

Peter Allyn said...

Thanks Wilson, and I still love your site.
Here is a comment I found on that sums up my situation!

"Precious few prizes are given in this world. Limited are the perfect unions of two hearts. Such a unifying force is rare in a place that values the expendable for being cheap and efficient. Memories are short lived and valuables are quickly replaced with little emotion or loss. Who am I to contribute to such a waste?"

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